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Topic #20 – Your Ringer Sucks

I know, you thought I’d quit.  I had a post before Christmas and hadn’t posted since then.  No end of the year message.  No Dummy Of The Year, etc.  Ah, the joy of New Years resolutions, eh?   Well – let’s get down to business, shall we?

There was a point, when cell phones first gained the capability to have customized ringers, that I too embraced the concept of changing the noise mine made when receiving a call.  At first it was those ridiculous ringers that were bad tonal renditions of actual songs.  Then the tech improved and people actually started being able to put real song clips on their phone, as well as clips of movies, TV shows and other banal things.  It was cool – hearing some voice in a poor attempt at Ebonics say, “Pick me up, foo!” or letting the world know that you were still a Public Enemy fan every time your phone rang.

That lasted about 3 months.  It’s been years since the ability to do this first started and I’m asking for us to please just go back to making cell phones ring like any other phone.  It’s never the person whose phone rarely rings that has the idiotic ring tone.  No, it’s always the person who has the most drama going on who consistently reminds me that “She’s got them apple bottom jeans, boots with the spurs…with the spurs”.  Thanks, but sweetheart there are no jeans that can make your bottom look like any other fruit than a watermelon.  What’s even better is the person who is a text message freak and has some long, drawn-out vocal-beeping-music combination of satanism that violently rips through a conversation or more excitingly, through silence.  Over.  And over.  Again.

I’m a cell phone person.  Mine is usually a few feet from my hand at almost all times.  I call people, regularly get calls and I text, yet somehow manage to do it all without having any sensory intrusion at all.  No ringer.  No vibration.  Just me, willing to check my phone every so often.  Now, some friends joke that I don’t answer my phone a lot and it’s a mixture of not seeing it light up and just not seeing the need to talk on the phone a whole lot, but no one really claims that I’m hard to get a hold of.  Maybe it’s that I’m just not that important.  Quite possible, but are you?  Next time you feel the need to let me know that when the snippet “Supaman dat ho” from the Soulja Boy song comes on, it’s your girlfriend calling, skip it, please.  If you have absurd ringers on your phone for calls and text messages, YOU AM DUMB.

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January 4, 2010 - Posted by | Uncategorized | , , ,

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