Youamdumb's Blog

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Topic #2 – Do Not Use My Seat For Leverage

I happen to fly quite a bit.  Generally I fly a couple of times per month, which compared to the past couple of years is quite a bit.  I’ve flown a couple of different airlines and have flown on a number of different sized aircraft.  The thread that seems to travel through all of these flights is the same:  there is always an idiot that doesn’t understand the simple physical reaction caused by using the back of my seat to pull themselves up or through to their seat.  I’ve been on planes with a lot of leg room and planes with almost none.  Every plane has an armrest.  Some go up, some don’t.  They are all capable of supporting the weight of even the tubbiest of passengers.  However, be it the corporate doucher with his ‘peek-a-boo’ wedding ring fingered hands, or the 300lb. so-called woman who could double as one of those giant Valentine’s Day Hershey Kisses, they all do the same thing – grab the top of my seat to violently pull themselves up, thus nearly catapulting me into the seat in front of me.

To be fair, I get up on airplanes also.  There’s nothing manly about wetting your pants and the challenge of actually hitting the toilet while in mid-flight is always a blast for me, so I treasure a mile-high trip to the water closet.  Somehow though, I can manage using my own weight and the help of my armrest to lift myself from my seat without so much as touching the seat in front of me.  Am I just more agile?  Not at all – I’m as clumsy as the next fool on a plane going hundreds of miles per hour.  I just prefer not setting myself up for a whiplash lawsuit from the passenger in 16c.  Basically, I actually give a shit about other human beings.  If you use the seat in front of you for leverage on airplanes, YOU AM DUMB.

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October 26, 2009 - Posted by | Uncategorized | ,

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